lulusensei asked: I really liked the Sometimes I Act Crazy one, I haven't finished reading, but not only it covers basically all the traits of BPD, it also explains to relatives and friends how to help the borderline too. I really liked it because it used mnemonics and other easy ways to remember techniques to support them in different cases.
zombiehearts asked: On the ESA question, I just thought I would mention that this is an American only thing and ESAs are not the same as service animals. They don't have public access rights or anything; though they are permitted in non pet friendly housing. This also means they don't need any training specific to your disability like SDs do, but you can't take them in non pet friendly public places. SD impersonation is a huge deal, so it's important to read up on the laws in your area if you go that route.
Yes, the law does not consider ESA’s to be service animals. Therefore, they are not protected by the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act). Perhaps it is possible that on a state or local level they are, as you say, permitted in no-pet housing, but I would be surprised.
Anonymous asked: hey, i think i have BPD and i can not have a normal relationship. it kills me. i'm afraid that i will be alone for the rest of my life. what should i do? also, my therapist is convinced that i have a schizoid personality but for me, it is very clear that i have all of the BPD symptoms. What do you think about that?
I don’t know much about schizoid personality disorder, but I would ask your therapist to explain it to you and why he/she thinks you have it.
It might not actually be that clear that you have BPD symptoms. That’s something a professional should assess. Again, I would ask your therapist to explain why he/she disagrees with this.
When you find the right treatment that works for you and work through recovery, being in a healthy relationship will be totally possible for you. I would venture to say that on this blog we’re all afraid that we are so flawed that we will be forever alone. But it’s just not true. A mental illness is an illness, not an inherent flaw. You are just as lovable as anyone on this planet.
<3 mallory
Anonymous asked: I'm having difficulty with attachment issues and abandonment issues, I'm not sure how to explain it but it's one of my weird phases where I'm completed obsessed with someone and get jealous at everything they do, hate them, but completely love them all over again. I'm getting too clingy and it's frustrating me, I'm scared she'll leave me and hate her when she doesn't talk to me. I get so angry, but when it's good it's really good. I just need some help controlling my thoughts and feelings? <3
I would strongly encourage you to go to therapy. I could offer you little bits of advice, but this is one of those issues that really needs to be processed and coached through by a therapist.
<3 mallory
musictolurepigeonsby asked: I don't like Walking On Eggshells at all. I felt it was really stigmatizing. I like, own, and refer people to I Hate You Don't Leave Me a lot, though. It's a bit outdated in regards to treatment because it was published in the 80s but the other information is great.
funeraldreams asked: also, if you really need the pet for therapy and get a written note by the doctor, i'm sure the landlord would allow you to have one. o3o hopefully! you should try asking!
Anonymous asked: Do you answer everything on here?
We try to. If someone asks for information in a post and people submit replies, I usually won’t post the redundant ones just so we don’t flood people’s dashboards. If you haven’t had your question answered yet, we probably just haven’t gotten to it. We get A LOT of asks. Also, Julie and I are trying to work on FAQ’s for questions we get frequently so if yours falls into that category, we might just be putting the answer in an FAQ.
- Mallory
funeraldreams asked: when i really got worse, my mother bought me a kitty despite her being slightly allergic. and my kitty has helped me a lot! i felt a lot less lonely having her around and she helped me through a lot of rough times before i had my boyfriend there for me. she's sleeping on my lap right now actually! the thing is, we got her through our own means and was not supported by the health care. i live in atlantic canada so i'm not sure if it's different anywhere else!
gotjilk asked: I would NOT recommend "The Siren's Dance", which is a man's account of his wife's BPD, following their divorce. He says the book is to raise awareness about BPD but instead it's demonizing. He never takes his own actions into account in the saga of the relationship (like he started to see her after he was one of her Psych staff during one of her suicide attempts, not appropriate or professional). He also basically says relationships with any person with this diagnosis are worthless. Pretty bad.
ugh that is unethical
Try to remember that when you submit things via fanmail it makes it extra hard for us to post them. I have a really old computer so it’s kind of a nuisance.
- mallory